• Privacy policy
  • T&C’s
  • About Us
    • FAQ
    • Meet the Team
  • Contact us
TLE ONLINE SHOP!
  • TLE
  • News
  • Politics
  • Business
  • Sport
  • Opinion
  • Elevenses
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • Film
    • Lifestyle
      • Horoscopes
    • Lottery Results
      • Lotto
      • Thunderball
      • Set For Life
      • EuroMillions
  • Food
    • All Food
    • Recipes
  • Property
  • Travel
  • Tech/Auto
  • JOBS
No Result
View All Result
The London Economic
SUPPORT THE LONDON ECONOMIC
NEWSLETTER
  • TLE
  • News
  • Politics
  • Business
  • Sport
  • Opinion
  • Elevenses
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • Film
    • Lifestyle
      • Horoscopes
    • Lottery Results
      • Lotto
      • Thunderball
      • Set For Life
      • EuroMillions
  • Food
    • All Food
    • Recipes
  • Property
  • Travel
  • Tech/Auto
  • JOBS
No Result
View All Result
The London Economic
No Result
View All Result
Home Satire

Scientists unsure how to dispose of Love Island contestants

Scientists are unsure how to dispose of Love Island contestants after the popular ITV show ends tonight. This comes after the news that an estimated 5.25 TRILLION pieces plastic waste are floating in our Oceans, with Eight million tonnes of plastic being dumped into the sea every year. Over two tons of that plastic waste […]

Satire by Satire
2017-07-24 16:58
in Satire
FacebookTwitterLinkedinEmailWhatsapp

Scientists are unsure how to dispose of Love Island contestants after the popular ITV show ends tonight.

This comes after the news that an estimated 5.25 TRILLION pieces plastic waste are floating in our Oceans, with Eight million tonnes of plastic being dumped into the sea every year.

Over two tons of that plastic waste was discovered washed up on Love Island, which had mutated into human-like sub-species.

Concerned with the extreme rise in plastics floating in the ocean and washing up on beaches all over the world, scientists say it’s imperative that disposal of these densely plastic creatures is managed properly.

Dr Chris Connors said ‘The amount of oil and plastic found in these things is unprecedented.

‘We don’t know what they are yet and we haven’t worked out how they survive with such low proportions of living parts in their bodies.

‘We also noticed they had very tiny brains, similar to seagulls.

RelatedPosts

BREAKING: The real reason the Dinosaurs became extinct revealed

PM’s red box says ‘I didn’t believe I was partying’ at Downing Street event

Monster Crash – Brexit Halloween with the Ghost Tories

HBO pens Brexit ending after growing impatient with proceedings

‘One thing is certain –they will soon be redundant, so they need to be disposed of quickly, efficiently, and without allowing any of their parts to spill into our oceans.’

Humans have created 1.9bn tonnes of plastic, with around half made within the last 13 years. Much of this is single-use plastic has made its way into our oceans through watercourses as a result of littering and poor waste management processes.

Former Oasis frontman Noel Gallagher added ‘The way we treat our environment, just tossing rubbish all over the place and producing more and more of it at ever increasing rates, is so stupid, it’s like we’re all just as fu%^ing thick and shallow as those Love Island contestants.’

Subscribe to our Newsletter

View our  Privacy Policy and Terms & Conditions

Trending on TLE

  • All
  • trending
Abdollah

‘Rescue us’: Afghan teacher begs UK to help him escape Taliban

CHOMSKY: “If Corbyn had been elected, Britain would be pursuing a much more sane course”

What If We Got Rid Of Prisons?

More from TLE

Austrian Quiz Taxi Takes to the Streets of London

Asylum seeker recalls ‘worst experience of my life’ living in UK barracks

Guilty driver tries – and fails – to escape police by climbing a tree after head-on collision

Facebook glitch sends millions of 50-cent followers to random personal profile

5 Interesting Jobs You May Never Have Thought Of…

Millions fear losing their homes as England’s eviction ban ends

Parliamentary Sketch 25th Nov – Osborne’s slashing discredited

Tories primed to call snap election after NI Protocol and Rwanda moves deemed a SUCCESS

Chancellor not frightened by minister’s warning over no-deal

Press watchdog slammed after rejecting huge number complaints over ‘misogynistic’ Mail Rayner story

JOBS

FIND MORE JOBS

About Us

TheLondonEconomic.com – Open, accessible and accountable news, sport, culture and lifestyle.

Read more

© 2019 thelondoneconomic.com - TLE, International House, 24 Holborn Viaduct, London EC1A 2BN. All Rights Reserved.




No Result
View All Result
  • Home
  • News
  • Politics
  • Business
  • Sport
  • Entertainment
  • Lifestyle
  • Food
  • Travel
  • JOBS
  • More…
    • Elevenses
    • Opinion
    • Property
    • Tech & Auto
  • About Us
    • Meet the Team
    • Privacy policy
  • Contact us

© 2019 thelondoneconomic.com - TLE, International House, 24 Holborn Viaduct, London EC1A 2BN. All Rights Reserved.