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Home Satire

Homicidal lunatic pledges £205bn for schools, hospitals & homes

A clear and present danger has just appeared in the UK and could destroy the world. A madman has asked for £205bn of our money to spend on the things we really need. Politicians’ have demanded that the death penalty is brought back to silence this psychopath who can only bring pain and misery on […]

TLE by TLE
2016-07-19 12:24
in Satire
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A clear and present danger has just appeared in the UK and could destroy the world. A madman has asked for £205bn of our money to spend on the things we really need.

Politicians’ have demanded that the death penalty is brought back to silence this psychopath who can only bring pain and misery on people with improved education, healthcare and affordable places to live.

Oliver Smythe-Hollings MP, 43 was shaking with rage as he briefed reporters, he said: “To think that this person can demand that we spend the public’s money on things that will improve their lives, is simply preposterous.

“What will really make them into more prosperous human being are four metal object that swim about between Scotland and the Faroe Islands, and occasionally they pop past Iceland as well. How can anyone not see the benefit this is going to bring to improved GCSE results in Basingstoke is beyond me.”

Due to a media blackout we are unable to report the views of the megalomaniac who is so unhinged, he wants to keep the world intact so, he could rule over us all, using his iron fist of peace, health and knowledge.

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