Mexico is bracing itself for a wave of migrants on an unprecedented level after Hurricane Irma left millions of American refugees seeking asylum in neighbouring countries.
Over the weekend Hurricane Irma battered parts of Florida, Georgia and South Carolina leaving 6.5 million without power, food or shelter. US officials have declared this a humanitarian crisis with one spokesperson telling us “boats have been wrecked, golf courses totalled and we’re finding fish in swimming pools. It’s going to be months before we’ll be able to get them all out”.
Mexican officials have stepped up border patrols as swarms of migrants begin their journey across Texas. With the numbers of displaced migrants getting higher each day, Mexican officials are anticipating an ‘autumn of chaos’.
There are already reports of restless refugees looting gun stores and sports shops as lawlessness breaks out across the Southern states.
Ricardo Gonzales Jose Miguel, campaigner for the Make Mexico great Again movement told us “The American government is cunning. They’re sending the bad ones over; the old ones with golf clothes and the fake ones with bronze bodies. Those people are not welcome over here.”
He continued “How do we know these guys aren’t radicalised? For all we know we could be letting in Baptists, Evangelicals and Moomins who want to rule Mexico with Moomin law. I’ve seen with my own eyes these swarms all carrying bibles and wearing hippopotamus suits”.
The UN has warned that only a small portion of illegals crossing the border are ‘genuine refugees’ seeking asylum with up to 60% believed to be American citizens in search of better food.
Words Tom Moore
https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/satire/95-of-brits-have-been-sent-back-to-uk-for-failing-language-test/18/01/