It isn't looking good for the PM...

“Confusion reigns among parents, teachers and pupils over who will be back in school tomorrow and who won’t.”

“I’m worried about patient safety because if these little things are happening now when we’re short and it’s busy, it’s only going to get worse."

How many more of these issues will emerge this year?

“Despite protestations from the Labour Party and do-gooding celebrities, the Home Secretary has not let up in her determination to remove foreign criminals from our country. "

“To put it another way, if an intelligent observer had been present on the early Earth as life first evolved, and was able to calculate the chances of the planet staying habitable for the next several billion years, the calculation may well have revealed very poor odds.”

“And then we’re straight into the next wave so nobody has had a break really for pretty much all year, so we are really worried about fatigue, stress, strain, and we’re doing everything that we can to try and support our staff. But it’s just always a worry.”

"Does Brandon Lewis fail to realise he’s extolling the virtues of EU membership or simply assume his intended audience is too gullible to grasp this?"

I am so thrilled with the idea of that man complaining about "obscene images" forever being known as "the tampon man".