The Class of 92 have made a joint statement to the press following the Unicef charity game apologising to the current squad for making scoring goals and creating chances look easy in front of a full Old Trafford crowd.
Coy Paul Scholes said: “It was too easy, Becks put a cross over and I headed it in, it was simple. I even shut my eyes when the ball came over and it just ended up in the net. Even when I tried not to score, I did, I couldn’t help it.”
The 40-year-old, who sprayed passes around the pitch, hit the crossbar and scored a goal went on to say: “I saw the tears in the eyes of the fans, it was like watching videos of a recently deceased pet; They couldn’t handle it.”
Ryan Giggs courageously held out an olive branch to the current squad and said: “We will lend them some of our Salford City strikers if they want; it is always good to help struggling sides in Manchester. I mentioned our tricky left winger to Louis but he claimed he didn’t want any troublesome players with a political allegiance, I’m really not sure he got it.”
Man Utd supporter Les, 45 from Eccles said “I couldn’t fucking believe my eyes, Phil Neville made Juan Mata look like Phil Neville.”
Since you are here
Since you are here, we wanted to ask for your help.
Journalism in Britain is under threat. The government is becoming increasingly authoritarian and our media is run by a handful of billionaires, most of whom reside overseas and all of them have strong political allegiances and financial motivations.
Our mission is to hold the powerful to account. It is vital that free media is allowed to exist to expose hypocrisy, corruption, wrongdoing and abuse of power. But we can't do it without you.
If you can afford to contribute a small donation to the site it will help us to continue our work in the best interests of the public. We only ask you to donate what you can afford, with an option to cancel your subscription at any point.
To donate or subscribe to The London Economic, click here.
The TLE shop is also now open, with all profits going to supporting our work.
The shop can be found here.
You can also SUBSCRIBE TO OUR NEWSLETTER .
