A man has hit the roof that he can't still go to the gym he used to be a member of. John Proud, 51, said: "Ages ago they opened this plush gym in the local area. We desperately needed one, but I never liked it." Reluctantly John joined the club,...
Facebook users up and down the country have exposed themselves as idiots by sharing their fury over the miscarriage of justice that took place when modern-day-martyr Tommy Robinson, or convicted criminal Stephen Yaxley-Lennon to use his real name, was convicted for contempt of court.
#Satire Janet Birch, a delivery firm fleet manager from Bromley, says she has been proved right that climate change is a hoax due to the arrival of Storm Emma, otherwise known as ‘The Beast from the East’. Storm Emma has bought chaos to the UK with heavy snowfall leaving motorists...
Today some Brexit voters are celebrating as the Home Office has announced that British passports will change from burgundy to blue after Britain leaves the EU. Conservative Immigration Minister Brandon Lewis said he was delighted to return to the ‘iconic’ blue and gold design, which despite not being used for...
A full list of compromises obtained from the European Union has been published on social media today. After pulling an all-nighter, European Commission President Jean-Claude Junker today announced that enough progress has been made in the first phase of Brexit talks to progress to talks about a trade deal. With the...
Reports this morning suggest the Foreign Secretary has been spotted pulling up at his office on Whitehall in an armoured vehicle, rather than his customary bicycle. Michael Gove could be seen helping Johnson reverse park the Challenger 2 outside the Foreign Office at around 8.30 am this morning. Witnesses confirm...
Prime Minister Theresa May has called into question the vetting of conference attendees after police investigations showed Johnson had legitimate accreditation granting him access to the hall, despite being a lying shitbag. The police confirmed that once an application has been passed to them by the Conservative party it is...
Apple have told their UK customers that they want their stores to be as close to a UK town square experience as possible. Sarah Jaziek, head of marketing said: “We have invested heavily in the UK town square market product, our focus groups revealed that we really needed a group...
Mexico is bracing itself for a wave of migrants on an unprecedented level after Hurricane Irma left millions of American refugees seeking asylum in neighbouring countries. Over the weekend Hurricane Irma battered parts of Florida, Georgia and South Carolina leaving 6.5 million without power, food or shelter. US officials have...