Categories: Satire

Zlatan Will Reveal His New Club ‘When He Sells 100 T-Shirts’

Zlatan Ibrahimovic will remain tight-lipped about his next club until he’s managed to flog “at least 100 t-shirts”, the sport star’s agent has revealed.

Speculation about the striker, who hit his prime five years ago, has been rife in the media as a potential hook-up with former boss Jose Mourinho looks in the offing.

But the former international star is unwilling to reveal his intentions, focusing rather on his new threads which are set to be “this summer’s big bomb”.

Luring fans to a press conference under the false guise of a definitive transfer answer he said: “When you buy tees, I’ll reveal my next club”.

Despite more than 100 people turning up to the press conference, early indications suggest the Swedish forward still needs to flog another 63 t-shirts until he reveals he’s going to Manchester United (or whoever else it may be).

With the Euros about to kick off on Friday, rumours are that Zlatan’s A-Z clothing line will be featured on stalls outside the grounds next to the half-and-half scarves and badges.

 

Jack Peat

Jack is a business and economics journalist and the founder of The London Economic (TLE). He has contributed articles to VICE, Huffington Post and Independent and is a published author. Jack read History at the University of Wales, Bangor and has a Masters in Journalism from the University of Newcastle-upon-Tyne.

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