The Secretary of State for Work and Pensions has decided to claw back some landmark laws he believes we don’t deserve anymore.
He was interviewed, during a love-in, on the Andrew Marr show, where he explained why he took his “tough decisions.”
On women’s right to vote he said: “I brought in universal credit to replace universal suffrage, they have had it too good for too long.”
On the 1833 Factory Act he said: “These children have not had to work a ten hour day in 183 years, they have had it too good for too long.”
On Indian Independence he said: “India was the Jewel in the Crown…” Andrew Marr interjected: “Have they had it too good too long?” Smith replied: ”No, I just can stand the little brown buggers.”
In response to claims the cost to repeal these laws would run into millions, he said: “It won’t cost more than the in-laws have in their bank,” which didn’t reassure anyone.
To conclude the interview Iain Duncan Smith said: “Don’t ever underestimate the power of a quiet psychopath,” as Andrew Marr wept tears of unbridled joy.
