Tory Cock-Up as Boris Johnson Sent to Sunderland

Foreign secretary Boris Johnson was accidentally sent to Sunderland after Tory staff confused the town for a British overseas territory.

Junior staff, one fresh out of Eton, were sent by the new Exiting the European Union select committee to explore the state of Sunderland Upon Wear after it was flagged that they had voted decisively for Brexit.

But there was confusion when the Foreign Secretary was asked to pay it a visit on national business, rather than the man engineering Britain’s exit from Europe David Davies.

A leaked Conservative memo confirmed that the cock-up had happened, saying the aides had been put off the scent by their strange dialect and neanderthal living habits.

One aide reported: “I positively believed we had been sent to the third World.

“They had a very basic grasp of the English language marked by an incessant use of “like” after every three words.

“Their caveman-like existence led me to believe it must have been a leftover part of the Empire we had all forgotten about.”

Fortunately Johnson was unavailable when the request for a state visit was filed. The Foreign Secretary is said to have become absorbed by the whereabouts of Rhodesia.

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