A, now middle aged, man is able to pinpoint the exact moment he became over the hill, after an unfortunate wardrobe malfunction.
James Pilchard, 35, was getting dressed when he accidentally tucked his jumper into his jeans, and thought, for a split second, it looked ok, quite smart.
Immediately the youthful version of himself took over and chastised him for his disgraceful behaviour, but James knew it was too late.
He said: “I immediately un-tucked the jumper and told myself it was a one off, but it wasn’t, it was the start of the end.
“The sad thing is, that I now know the exact moment, I became a middle aged bore. I am going to get Jan 3rd 10.23am branded onto my skin, as a painful reminder that I am now an old twat.
“I was on the way to the pub, that fateful day, to watch the football with the lads, but instead found myself in the car, in an almost out of body experience, driving to B & Q to buy a trowel, and that saddest thing is I don’t even have a garden.
“I told my mates about it and they asked if I had made any strange CD purchases recently. I said no, then I remembered buying Snow Patrol’s greatest hits, and the fact I bought a CD at all should have set off the warning signs…fuck.”