Parliamentary Sketch

PMQs 8th June – A Farage mirage Vs the remain brain drain

By Joe Mellor, Deputy Editor

The on-line voting registration system had crashed, EU citizens had wrongly been given polling cards and both sides have predicted the world will end on the 23rd June depending on which box you tick. So unsurprisingly the EU referendum led today’s session.

At one stage Cameron pointed across the chamber and said: “look, the Lib Dems, Greens, and trade unions are all on the same side.” A Brexiteer axis of evil if ever I seen one. This is what the EU referendum has come to, each person clinging onto their sworn enemies, as they all drown in (and with) unison.

I’ve got a pretty bad hangover today, so I am not sure if this has added to my cynical mindset, but I don’t see how these politicians, on all sides, can regain their credibility after June 23rd, if indeed they had any in the first place.

Anyway, I have continued my PMQs Brexiteer watch, mainly for my own amusement, as I find Tories openly squabbling between themselves strangely satisfying, like a hot towel pressed against your face after a racy Lamb Jalfrezi.

Brexiteer watch

Richard Drax, said Cameron had made no treaty changes and had denigrated our great country. The PM said supporting the EU is not doing our country down, “We don’t want Farage’s little England, but a strong Britain in Europe.”

Karl McCartney, Karl was perturbed about the EU black hole and why the UK were forced to pay a £1.7bn surcharge. The PM said: “the only person who can give up the British rebate is me as long as I’m here”, which is rapidly turning into the point of the exercise.

Dr Liam Fox, was quite sensual (never thought I would say that about the former Secretary of State for defence) regarding the vote: “the beauty of a referendum is that we each have an equal voice, it is not a consultation, remain means remain, leave must mean leave”. The PM agreed, but I would quite like to see the Commons block it, if we vote for Brexit, just to see if Bill Cash can get any angrier.

Peter Bone, has rallied the toops and will march on Witney, the PM’s constituency, with his Leave campaigners this weekend and demanded to know if Cameron will be there. Sadly not, he would rather talk to Andrew Marr, that’s how much he doesn’t want to bump into Bonesy’s clan.

John Baron, who moaned the remain camp had fudged the statistics and being in the EU discriminates against people from outside the EU. This left Cameron to ask: “so does the Leave campaign now want more immigration, just from different places.”

Sycophantic question of the day

Craig Mackinlay, Con, who begged the PM to visit Thanet South and come to the “Discovery Park”. Cameron clearly didn’t consider it in the past, but he is that desperate for allies, he might well be popping down to the trading estate in Kent this weekend, anything to avoid Bone’s buccaneering Brexiteers.


Cameron, I rarely feel sorry for ex-Bullingdon club boys, but the attacks against him are relentless. Oh wait, the referendum was his idea, so I take that all back.

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