16/09/14 – The London Economic

By Charlotte Hope @charlottehope

Katie Price names baby ‘Bunny

 Katie Price, at least initially, became famous for having massive boobs. Is that an incorrect analysis? Obviously she’s expanded her empire to reality TV, books, a song (did she release that song?) and probably fragrances. I haven’t looked properly. What do you think Katie Price’s fragrance (provided she has one) smells of? I dare not venture a guess. Okay, you twisted my arm. I reckon it would smell like sweaty fishnets and yesterday’s hair spray. Oh, lovely! I’ll take nine bottles.

My take on this particular episode of Katie Price’s very public life is that she didn’t know she was pregnant, realised she was pregnant, then almost immediately gave birth. In the mix there was some sort of affair and a kicking of a man out of her house. I think they’re back together. There’s a lot of material for the argument that this column could be better researched, let me tell you. She seemed to have the baby ages ago – and with a little digging I can confirm it was 6 weeks ago – and has only just announced the name. I don’t know why anyone wants her to announce the name, but she’s gone and done it anyway. She’s called the unsuspecting infant ‘Bunny’. Why are people surprised? It’s relatively tame. She’s got one child who is literally called Princess Tiaamii. Also there’s a person on TV at the moment called ‘Binky’? I don’t even know.

An Orange is the New Black writer fell in love with a cast member

 In a lot of ways, this is a very sweet love story. Allegedly, Lauren Morelli, a writer for Orange is the New Black, is in a relationship with Samira Wiley, an actor in Orange is the New Black. Sweet, no? Everyone* is going crazy, however, because Morelli and her husband of 2 years filed for divorce this past weekend. Therein lies the drama. Although, it’s not massive drama as Morelli wrote an essay in May this year talking about how she realised she was gay whilst writing for OITNB and that she’d fallen in love with a woman. It’s a lovely read.

Now E! news is saying that her relationship with Wiley is reportedly official. It even sent out an email blast to that effect. Not that I get those. It’s research, okay? You were just saying that I need to do more, Jeez. ‘Why is this news?’I hear you cry. Surely it isn’t. The two regularly post Instagram pictures of themselves together and in one Wiley is kissing Morelli. I’m no Poirot but I got the picture pretty quickly. Besides, they attended the Emmys together and very much looked like a couple in love. Good for them! It’s nice when stories, however non-linear the narrative, have a happy little ending like this one.

*very few people on Twitter

Kanye West and the disabled

Ah, Kanye. The master of all things ridiculous has gone and done something ridiculous again. He certainly knows how to come up trumps. As his ‘Yeezus’tour hit the Sydney Credit Union Arena recently he proclaimed that he couldn’t continue with his song until everyone stood up. Good job he’s playing small, intimate venues in which he can see everyone, right? How can he even police that sort of demand? All of these pertinent questions aside, West noticed a couple of fans were still sitting. How very dare they? Well, it turned out they had no choice, because they’re disabled.

Apparently West demanded they stood up until one person waved a prosthetic limb in the air. Did this really happen? Good sport, prosthetic limb fan. Upon this, he turned his attention to a fan in a wheelchair. Not believing that this person was in a wheelchair, West’s bodyguard actually went to check before verifying that yes, this young fan – who potentially didn’t want to be singled out let alone become the subject of internet outrage – was in fact in a wheelchair. Once it had been confirmed, West launched into his next number. Nice.

 

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