“I think David Cameron is alright for a Tory, he’s done a decent job”. “I feel sorry for David Cameron”- are both things I’ve heard from two of my, supposed, left-wing friends over the past few days. “Are you having a f*cking laugh?” was my immediate, no-nonsense response. But somehow DC – an acronym that also stands for a vulgar obscenity that would be an apt description of him – has got away with shoving a huge stick of TNT into the belly of our society and strolling away nonchalantly.
And as he trots off humming merrily into the sunset, I’m left scratching my head. Why? Because this is the man who, essentially, flipped a coin to see whether or not Britain should stay in the European Union. I just can’t fathom why the media aren’t directing abuse at him in the same way they did for Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage (don’t get me wrong, both of these clowns do deserve their fair share, too)? Why is Jeremy Corbyn being blamed for the Remain campaign’s loss? I’ll tell you why, it’s because David Cameron is an impeccable PR man.
This king of spin has craftily deflected criticism in the past by letting his pals take the heat. Think about the abuse Gove received (and rightly so) for his misguided school reforms, and Osborne for his hand in the despicable austerity measures imposed on Britain over the last few years. Of course, they both have a lot to answer for, but, ultimately, who does the buck stop with? Imagine a school went into special measures, who would be to blame? The teachers, the children or the headmaster?
Definitely the headmaster. Because when you’re in a position of power you have to be accountable for your actions, as well as the actions of your staff and those you are there to serve. Cameron, as far as I’m concerned, has never really taken the blame for anything in his time as Prime Minister – not even when he had sex with that pig.
What’s funnier than pig gate, is that Cameron, who has spent most of his time recently telling us how he saved us from a recession and reinvigorated our economy, is now the one that has destroyed it. His massive PR stunt gambled on the hope that angry British people – who have experienced inexplicable levels of austerity, had their NHS driven into the ground and are feeling more disillusioned, divided and generally under-represented now more than ever – would make a rational choice and choose to remain in Europe.
This ill-thought out, idiotic manoeuvre is what he should be judged on. So how he has managed to slide out of 10 Downing Street with his reputation still even remotely intact is beyond me. Never mind sitting in a flash £16million house playing scrabble, he should be out there explaining to young people why they might not be able to freely travel, live and work in Europe anymore in two years’ time. He should be the person who answers the difficult question about whether or not EU migrants, who have been living in this country for the last five, ten or 20 years, are allowed to stay. But somehow we’ve let him off the hook.
Even when he was asked questions about what Brexit actually means to Britain in the House of Commons he might as well have shrugged his shoulders. So now, when I see him whistling, humming and making wise-cracks, I clench my fist and grit my teeth, wondering how many more people are doing the same. This man, for me, is exactly the reason so many people are so disengaged with politicians. He lies, he bullies and he ducks and dives questions like a coked up dodgeball player. He claims to represent working-class, day-to-day people yet has done everything in his power to screw us over.
I hope he looks back on his time as PM and feels some regret, for we shall suffer the consequences of his catastrophically poor decision – whether that’s short term or long term nobody knows. We may or may not prosper in the future, but for now, the majority of people that took him up on his gamble and raised him ten (Brexiters), are the people most likely to suffer the immediate negative effects as a result.
As we lick our wounds and wander into a realm shrouded with uncertainty, one thing is clear: the EU – through fear of implosion – will make an example of Britain and he is the man to blame for it. Not the people who voted for Brexit or the migrant next door, not Boris Johnson, not even Farage and certainly not Jeremy Corbyn.
Sadly, it is the man who tipped the first domino – he who offered up the EU referendum to win the last general election and was supposed to be fronting the Remain campaign – that has walked away with his reputation practically unscathed. So no, I don’t feel sorry for him and I certainly don’t think he is ‘alright’ – I think he’s a complete DC. I think he is an embarrassment to the country he was elected to serve, and should be constantly reminded of what he’s done to the future of our once incredible island, over, and over again.
The saddest reality is, while Britain stands trial for the attempted murder of the EU, that grinning assassin walks free – and something about that just doesn’t seem right.